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Corn Pone Flicks Presents Recent Episodes of CPF Reviews
CPF dissects recent media phenomenons such as The Last Jedi, Twin Peaks: The Return, and Stranger Things. The Kronies are Coming! Actually, the Kronies came and went many years ago, but their activities have been a secret, until now! Read about how a conspiracy which never really even existed nevertheless managed to bring down an entire convention. Be thankful that it wasn't yours (unless it was yours, in which case, well, that's what you get when you fuck with the Kronies). Click here to read about what some people (mostly us) have called "The Greatest Fan Story Ever Told."
The Kronies are Coming!
Actually, the Kronies came and went many years ago, but their activities have been a secret, until now! Read about how a conspiracy which never really even existed nevertheless managed to bring down an entire convention. Be thankful that it wasn't yours (unless it was yours, in which case, well, that's what you get when you fuck with the Kronies). Click here to read about what some people (mostly us) have called "The Greatest Fan Story Ever Told."
Corn Pone Flicks Decides to Finish Ozone Commandos Part 2 After All
"Yes, I'm crazy."
Literally decades after anyone stopped giving a damn, I found myself suddenly possessed by an inexplicable desire to dive back into the project that will not die and finally kill it once and for all. Well, it's not wholly inexplicable; we put a real shitload of work into this ridiculous movie and it always rankled me that it looked as though the concluding chapter would never see the light of day. Thanks to improved home technology, part two looks like it's going to whittle the totally absurd seventeen-year production time of the first episode down to a mere two to three years, two of which are already behind me as of this writing. The bulk of the second part has been completed, with only the hardest bits remaining, because I'm really bad about doing that. Anyone wanting to get the full lowdown on the production should read the production diary.
CPF shifts focus to videos essays on film/TV
"I can do this shit alone."
And that's the reason in a nutshell. It's increasingly hard to get people together to make ridiculous short films about inflatable crocodiles eating hapless wildlife molesters and spoofs of soon-to-be-released (or often were-released-a-few-years-earlier) Hollywood films, especially when many of the old gang have actually moved out of the freaking country. As our ability to make products that might potentially be confused with actual filmmaking has increased, the time and available bodies with which to do so have tilted the other direction. Owing to the fact that I actually give a shit about quality and cannot abide jump-cuts, these have been trickling out at the rate of one every few months since I picked them back up again last summer. Hopefully, Ozone Commandos work notwithstanding, they should continue to trickle out at a similar rate in the forseeable future.
Leper Jim Wonders Why He's Still on This Page
Leper Jim Remarks "I'm totally irrelevant!"
Failed cultural icon Leper Jim is flabbergasted at his continued appearance on the CPF website's news page, as he has featured in no actual CPF news since 1997. "The last time anyone mentioned my name, people still thought Y2K was a real issue. Move on, people."
Here's a quick guide to what the site is all about:
First, this News page here will contain important information regarding the site, and the very latest from the CPF crew themselves. Commonly read (we hope) editorials, instruction pages, special reports, and links to other sites are referenced in the far left sidebar.
The Filmography page contains a listing of all of Corn Pone Flicks' projects in a list form. Clicking on a title from the list pops up a window with exquisite detail about each work, some of which is even true. The Filmography page also includes a link to up-to-date information regarding upcoming CPF projects.
The About CPF page contains biographical and other information about the cast of characters that makes up the gestalt of zaniness known as Corn Pone Flicks.
The Contact page is VERY VERY important. Okay, it used to be. Now it's just basically there for anyone who wants to get in touch for whatever reason, since most of our films are available online. If you do want physical copies for some reason, though, this is the place to go.
The CPF Reviews page contains all the info you need on what films you ought to like or dislike in order to be at all cool.
The Captain Harlock Archives is our newest section, providing all the info you ever wanted to know about Captain Harlock and related series, buttressed between mounds of trivia you never cared about knowing. If you read something elsewhere that seems to contradict what you read in here, it's only because the other source is wrong.
The CPF Mailing List is a place to go to if you want to blather about our crap (or at least listen to us do so) and/or ask questions and such. Someday, one of the fifty-odd current members who aren't actually in CPF might actually ask some, so be there when it happens!!
The CPF F.A.Q. contains additional info the curious reader might wish to peruse regarding what we do and why. So don't say we never talk to you.